The Prophet (s.a.w) is reported to have observed as follows: "A woman who said her five daily prayers, regularly fasted in the month of Ramadan, refrained from evil acts and did what her husband told her to do, will, on the day of judgement, be authorized to enter into paradise by whichever of the door thereof she might like to enter."

I believe that every girl should look up to Hazrat Khadija (ra), the first wife of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w), as the perfect example of the ideal wife. It was Khadija (ra) who, upon being told of the revelation received by the Prophet (s.a.w) consoled him with the following words, "Oh no, by God, Allah will never let thee down for thou art a man of goodness and kind acts."


We should always remember that Islam grants women and men equal rights. However, there is an exception which has been stated in the Holy Qur'an, "...The men have a rank above them (women). And Allah is Mighty, Wise" [Holy Qur'an 2:220]. Although women are granted equal rights in many matters, men are considered the head of the household, resulting in a smooth running family life. Men have been created physically stronger than women, hence having to earn for the family. As the man earns for his wife's necessities, she spends that wealth. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w) has also stated that man is the master of the family and shall be answerable for the actions and behaviours of all its members. Which is why, in some cases, Islam has placed men above the women.

BE VIRTUOUS
It is the responsibility of the wife, to be virtuous and well behaved, in order to guide her family: "So virtuous women are those who are obedient, and guard the secrets of their husbands with Allah's protection" [Holy Qur'an 4:35]. A virtuous wife is one who manages her household in the best manner, who behaves kindly towards her husband, and makes the household an abode of peace. The result of this goodness will be peace and bliss, in this life and the hereafter, InshaAllah.

BE OBEDIENT
The wife must be willing to co-operate with her husband willingly, in order to make her home, paradise on Earth. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w) once said that "If it had been lawful to prostrate before anyone besides Allah, He would certainly have commanded women to prostrate before their husbands." He also stated that, "The best women is she who adorned herself to look loveable in the eyes of her husband and who was pleased when he saw her; and she gracefully accepted decisions made by her husband and obeyed them cheerfully and she always took particular care to not displease her husband in any way or looked repugnant to him."

However, there is an exception to this aspect of 'obedience'. The wife should refuse to obey her husband, if he is disobeying a command of Allah. Always remember that we must please Allah, before anyone else. For example, if he urges her not to pray, not to fast during Ramadan, or give up the commandment of Purdah, she has the right to disobey him. As well, men have no right to hurt their wives in any way. The Prophet (s.a.w) has said about those men who do so, that they are not at all good people, and that they are certainly not from among the best of men. Men have been given the right to be above women. However, if the husband abuses this right in any way, then the wife has the right to seek divorce.

In regards to obedience in Islam, the Promised Messiah (as) once said, "For women it is imperative that she should obey her husband. The Holy Prophet (s.a.w) has emphasized this so much that once he said, "For the woman it is imperative that she should obey her husband." The Holy Prophet (s.a.w) has emphasized so much on this that once he said, "If a husband asked his wife to shift a heap of bricks from one place to another, and after she had done it, he told her to carry them back to the former place, she must do that without a question." "This should not be regarded as a act of cruelty on the part of the husband for similar obligations have been imposed upon men also in respect of their wives. These obligations are so onerous that it looks as if the woman was placed on the throne ad the man commanded to serve her and be at her beck and call for the procurement of everything she needs." [Malfoozat: Vol. 8; pp. 441-445]

THE IDEAL QUALITIES OF A WIFE
The Holy Prophet (s.a.w) has stated that:

1. The wife should not allow anyone into the house whom the husband does not like and if the husband tells his wife that a certain type of men and women must not enter the house, it would be her duty to comply with this direction.
2. The wife must not give charity from her husband's money without his permission. If she does so, the reward for it shall accrue to the husband and the sin to the wife. 
3. The wife must not go out of the house without the permission of her husband.
4. She may give any amount in charity out of her own possessions, but God Almighty shall approve and prefer that the woman obeyed her husband rather than give heaps of her wealth in charity. 
5. No woman may fast, while the husband is in the house, without his approval, except the fasts which are obligatory in Ramadan. 
6. "The best of wives is the one whose sight pleases you, i.e., who keeps herself in a state that may be pleasing to her husband; and when you ask her to do a thing, she obeys you and when you are away from the house she guards your property and her own modesty for you." - Prophet (s.a.w)

In today's society, the concept of marriage is sometimes ignored. The reason for this is that many non-Muslims live their life with a partner (boyfriend/girlfriend) without marrying. In return, attaining everything that we Muslims believe should be attained after marriage. Since this mindset is prevalent in a lot of the youth, the Muslim youth sometimes forget their core teachings of marriage in Islam. Which is why, upon request, I decided to remind the youth about the importance of marriage in Islam and the reasons our Jama'at gives it so much importance.




There are three main reasons or categories, that the purpose of marriage can be divided into.

TO EXPERIENCE LOVE & HAPPINESS
It is a natural for human beings to want to experience love and happiness. But in Islam, it must be done while remaining within the correct boundaries. Marriage is meant for the attainment of peace of mind and mutual love and affection. 
"And of His signs is this, that He has created wives for you from among yourselves that you may find peace of mind in them. And He has put love and tenderness between you." [Holy Qur'an 30:22]
Just as we wear clothing to cover our bodies, and safeguard them from the heat and cold. A husband and wife must act as a cover for each other's chastity and honour.
"They (women) are a garment for you and you are a garment for them."

TO RAISE CHILDREN IN A STABLE HOUSEHOLD
Procreation is another purpose of marriage. 
"Your wives are a sort of tilth for you; so approach your tilth as and when you like and send ahead some good for yourself." [Holy Qur'an 2:224]
This verse states the importance of producing a healthy progeny for one's own benefit and the benefit of the entire community. With marriage, children are able to live in a complete family environment, for the betterment of society. 

TO PROVIDE A LEGAL UNION WHICH SAFEGUARDS AGAINST MORAL/SOCIAL DEGRADATION
Upon marriage, the husband and wife become safe against immorality and fornication. This is because, marriage is a means of preventing the eyes from looking at someone else with the wrong intentions. The Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) has stated "Marry such women as are productive and of loving nature." [Nisaee Kitabun Nikah] The purpose of marriage is to enjoy each other's love and tenderness and to feel comfortable and safe within each other's company.