WHERE DID THIS HOLIDAY COME FROM?

Halloween originates from old Irish pagan practices. It was believed that on October 31st, supernatural forces gathered in the human world. Supposedly, the lord of the dead gathered all the souls of the dead from the previous year who dwelled in animals, and would announce which animal the souls would dwell in, in the coming year.

TRICK-OR-TREATING

It is said that if a household gives something to a costume-clad child, the dead will not harm their household.

ISLAM'S PERSPECTIVE

Shirk, Shirk, Shirk. (idolatry)

No matter how 'fun' this day may look to be, it is wrong for a Muslim child to dress up in a strange manner and beg at the door of strangers - even if it may just be for candy.

Halloween sends across the message that it is 'okay' to believe in witches, evil spirits, and satanic worship. By trying to please these dead spirits, as if, equal to God, it is definitely a form of shirk/idolatry. Moreover, Islam believes that spirits cannot come back from the dead, nor can they be reborn in any form (eg. animals) in this world. As a Muslim, do not try to mix in with the West and get embroiled in hidden shirk/idolatry.

The Qur'an says:

HALLOWEEN TODAY

Nowadays, Halloween is a holiday that is being abused by older children as a way to frighten people in their homes, disrespect elders, and cause disturbances. Thus, Muslim children should instead increase their connection with God.

Many people start following practices that they see practiced in society without thinking. Carelessly, some Muslims parents let their children participate in these traditions without any thought to its origin. But as Hazrat Mirza Masroor Ahmad (aba) has stated, "any 'fun' that is based on shirk is to be avoided".

6 TIPS FOR PARENTS

It can be difficult for a child to fully grasp the reason he/she is not allowed to dress up or go trick-or-treating - especially in the West! Children see their classmates in costumes, and may feel left-out if they are unable to do the same. I've compiled a list of a few actions that parents can take, to ensure that they can help their children better understand the reason for not celebrating Halloween.

1. Get The Facts - Parents should know where Halloween originated from and why it is harmful so that they are able to explain it to their children (I hope this post has helped with that!).
2. Unity - Make sure you and your spouse are on the same page! The last thing you want is for one partner to be explaining the reason Halloween is harmful, while the other spouse counters their arguments!
3. Explain the Facts - Children are smarter than you think! When children ask "why," a simple, "because you can't!" will not suffice! You need to explain all the facts, as stated in this post! 
4. Accept Reality - Children will compare themselves to other Muslim families who perhaps do celebrate Halloween. It is important that you explain to them that every family does things differently, it does not mean their decision is right for your family!
5. Get Their Mind Off Halloween - If you and your child agree, keep them home from school on Halloween. Instead, do activities with them to get their mind off of what they feel they may be missing out on. Remind them that they are not missing out on anything! 
6. Build Up the Excitement for Islamic Holidays - Living in the West, it is hard to avoid the excitement for Western holidays. Sometimes it looks as if Halloween and Christmas decor is literally everywhere. It seems that everyone is talking about their costumes on Halloween or presents on Christmas. For this reason, it is important for parents to ensure that there is an excitement being built up at home for the children to know Eid is coming up. It is not necessary for you to spoil them with presents or adopt new traditions. However, don't make them feel as if the other holidays are 'better' just because they live in the West. 

Sources:
Friday Sermon - October 29th, 2010 - Hazrat Mirza Masroor Ahmad (aba)

Post wedding/marriage blues are very real. Sadly, they're not something that's really talked about. However, blues can often lead to depression, making it a serious topic to address. Unfortunately, the discussion of depression is quite taboo in our culture.
This is why I believe it's an important topic to write about.

For many girls I know, they didn't even know the 'blues' existed until they experienced them for themselves.

For those who haven't experienced it, it can feel kind of like this:
You're very happy because you've married the love of your life; You're so grateful to get to spend the rest of your lives together; You feel sad knowing that your wedding is now over; There are random days when you're down but don't know why; It's scary to think that your life has forever changed; You feel guilty for feeling the way that you do; You miss your family; But despite all of this, you couldn't be happier.

Confusing, I know. But anyone who has experienced them can sum them up the same way.

So why do we go through, 'Post Wedding Blues/Depression' and how can we deal with it?

Anti-Climactic:
On average, couples spend months to over a year, planning the wedding of their dreams. This consists of constant appointments, errands, and things to do. Suddenly, all of the planning, attention and excitement is over.

• Change Your Perspective: This is why we must change our perspectives. Don't think of your wedding as the climax. Avoid thoughts such as, "I put everything into planning a wedding, and now it's over." Instead, look at the wedding as the beginning of your lives together. You're fortunate to have married your partner whom you get to spend the rest of your life with, Insha'Allah. 

Loneliness:
Many brides get married off into their husbands families and have to live in a joint family for some time. Others move straight into a separate house with their husband. For myself, the loneliness stemmed from living alone with my husband. For someone who had grown up with 3 other siblings, I had become so used to having family around. And so, spending the majority of the day alone in an empty house became quite depressing.

•  Social Engagements: Don't isolate yourself completely from your family and friends, Yes, your partner should now be your priority; but, when you can, make time for your family and friends. Invite them over for dinner or go over to their homes. If you stop meeting everyone completely, it can really put you down; especially, if you're a very people-oriented person. 

• Hobbies: Everyone has a different activities that bring them peace. For myself, it was reading and improving myself. Among this was rereading "Hazrat Amman Jan (ra)" in order to make myself a better wife, daughter and mother (Insha'Allah). This not only helped me kill time but also let me gain religious knowledge, leading to more inner peace. 

Responsibilities:
For many, marriage can be an overwhelming shift from minimal responsibility to all the responsibility. You now have to divide up all the household responsibilities amongst yourselves. There's also a financial burden of having to deal with daily expenses. Basically, you now need to 'hardcore adult'. For someone with minimal experience doing tasks, this can be quite difficult.

• Experience: Girls, I know your mothers are always saying "Learn to cook! Learn to clean!" and I'm sorry to be the one to say this, but mother's are always right. Having experience doing things around the home can make the transition into marriage a whole lot easier! You won't be dealing with the emotional transition in to marriage alongside trying to cook a proper meal, do the laundry, or clean. And so, these responsibilities will feel a lot less stressful.

Just remember, marriage is the start of an amazing journey with your best friend! Before your marriage, during your marriage, and after your marriage,  continue to pray with each other and for each other. Once the blues have died down and you've become comfortable with this new 'normal', Insha'Allah your life will be better than you could have ever imagined. But remember, just like your life before marriage had good days, bad days, exciting days and boring days...your life after marriage will too. This does not mean that marriage is to blame. Life wouldn't be life without its ups and downs. But Insha'Allah you experience many more ups than you do downs.

I suggest the following prayer to all of you:

رَبَّنَا هَبْ لَنَا مِنْ أَزْوَاجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّاتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعْيُنٍ وَاجْعَلْنَا لِلْمُتَّقِينَ إِمَاماً

Rabbana hab lana min azwajina wa dhurriyatina qurrata a`yunin wa’j`alna li’l muttaqina imama.

“Our Lord! Grant unto us spouses and offspring who will be the comfort of our eyes, and give us (the grace) to lead the righteous.” [Qur’an, 25:74]

Most couples experience the 'blues' after marriage. Please keep in mind that the blues are short term and have different symptoms. If, however, they lead to depression like symptoms, I advise you to seek medical help!

Blues:

• Sadness, 'empty' feeling
• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities you once enjoyed
• Restlessness

Depression:

• Fatigue
• Inability to sleep
• Feeling worthless
• Difficulty concentrating
• Recurrent thoughts of death or suicide

If you experience the symptoms of depression for five or more recurring days you may have depression. Your doctor can help screen you for depression and help you manage and treat your symptoms so you feel better.

I pray that may Allah bless all of you with amazing life partners and bless your marriages, Ameen.

1. Pray Your Salat
The importance of Salat has been emphasized in the Qur'an countless times. Allah has stressed that Muslims offer Salat regularly in order to achieve the benefits that come with it.

• Gain Nearness to Allah: With prayer, we can develop a bond with our Creator and learn to pray to thank Allah and seek help during difficult times.
• Taqwa: Piety or righteousness is achieved through Salat. This is because Salat keeps us away from wrongdoing, ensuring that we learn to do what's right in order to please Allah.
• Reward in the Hereafter: The Prophet (pbuh) said, "The first thing the people will be accountable for on the Day of Judgement is prayer, Allah will say to His angels: "Look at my servants prayers. Were they complete or not?" If they were complete It will be written as complete. If they were not fully complete Allah will say: "See if my servant has voluntary prayers, If he has them Allah will Say: Complete his obligatory prayers shortage with his voluntary prayers." Then the rest of his deeds will be dealt with in the same manner", (Reported by Abu Dawood).
• Protection from Satan: Satan is an enemy of the believers and tries to stray them from their path of righteousness. Not offering prayer is actually a sign of us following Satan, whereas those who offer prayer are resisting temptation from Satan.

In the Holy Qur'an, Istighfar is seen as drawing the strength and support of Allah which leads to attaining nearness to Allah and salvation. The Holy Qur'an states:

But surely the righteous will be in the midst of gardens and springs, receiving what the Lord will give them; for they used to do good before that. They used to sleep but a little of the night; and at the dawn of the day they sought forgiveness...[51:16-19]

SaveSaveSaveSave

1. Designated Worship Room/Area: 

Many of our homes are filled with pictures, wall-art, TVs and other distractions. Thus, setting aside a room/area of the home that has none of these distractions, rather access to the material needed to worship and remember Allah (i.e. a Prayer mat, Qur'an), is a great way to stay focused while praying or reading the Qur'an. Moreover, passing by this room/area can serve as a reminder to pray and remember Allah.

Source: http://room-decorating-ideas.com/muslim-prayer-room-design/

2. Islamic Library: 

In the Holy Qur'an, Allah has commanded us to constantly seek knowledge. As well, the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him) advised us to:

'Seek knowledge from the cradle to the grave'.

The only way to do this, is to have access to the resources needed for attaining this knowledge within our reach. Nowadays, so many Islamic books are available online (i.e. ebooks), and so having a hard copy is not necessary. However,  having hard copies of a few key books (i.e. prayer books, commentaries of the Qur'an, etc.) is a good idea. The attention and focus you will have on a book that's in your hand, will far exceed an electronic copy, due to several other distractions. It's also a good way to rest your eyes and write notes on the books to better understand the content. Also, if you have young children, having kids Islamic books on these shelves will teach them how to rely on these books for knowledge. Reading these books will help you gain knowledge on living a better life.

Source: http://www.switchconsignment.com

3. Written Reminders:

4. Get Rid of Negative Noise:

5. Lead By Example:

With all of the above said, it is very important to live by example. Read your prayers on time, recite the Qur'an, constantly pray to Allah, stay calm, don't raise your voice, etc.  By keeping yourself absorbed in the remembrance of Allah, and living your life following Allah's commands, you will be a role model for your parents, siblings, spouse and children. On the other hand, if you listen to foul music, watch inappropriate TV shows, yell, never remember Allah, and remain stressed, your home will never attain peace. As the Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

"Each of you is a sheperd, and each of you is responsible for his flock...A man is a sheperd in charge of the inhabitants of his household and he is responsible for his flock; a women is a sheperdess in charge  of her husband's house and children and she is responsible for them..."

Remember, it was narrated by Abu Hurairah and Abu Sa'eed that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said

"No people sit in a gathering remembering Allah, But the angels surround them, mercy covers them, tranquility descends upon them and Allah remembers them before those who are with Him."

So remember Allah along with your loved ones so that your home can be surrounded by angels and always be at peace.

It is important to eat and drink right during Sehri (Suhoor), in order to survive the long and hot summer fasts. Sehri is an important part of keeping a fast, and thus should not be skipped.


It is important to indulge in a hydrating and nourishing Sehri to give our bodies the strength to make it through the fast. Unfortunately, many people are starting to skip Sehri in order to sleep in longer. However, doing this, they are missing out on the rewards and blessings that come with this important part of keeping a fast.

Be sure to include fruits, vegetables, grains, protein, and dairy.

Here are some quick and easy options:

DRINKS

• Banana, Strawberry, Peach: granola, nuts, greek yogurt, chia seeds
• Mixed Berry: blueberries, raspberries, strawberries, spinach
• Mango: mangoes, yogurt, milk, banana
• Banana-Peanut Butter: bananas, peanut butter, nonfat milk, honey  

1) MAKE A SCHEDULE

"How can you follow a strict schedule?"

4) PUT IN TIME FOR GOD

Sometimes it feels like we don't have enough hours in the day to study, and so it can be quite challenging to make time to pray. However, I assure you, success without prayer is not the right kind of success. Incorporate the prayers into your schedule, start your day off with Fajr and give yourself an early start to your studying. Finally end your day off with Ishaa, and go to sleep. This will really help you get 6-7 hours of sleep! Pray and ask Allah for help! This is not only the best stress reliever, but it's also a good way to force yourself to get up and move. I don't know about you, but when I'm studying, I feel like I sit for hours straight just trying to get information in my head. To prevent your body from getting soar, get up, move a little, and pray. And if you're worried about time still, 5-10 minutes will not harm your studying! Trust me :) 

Some little prayers that are helpful for exams are:

رَّبِّ زِدْنِى عِلْمًا

رَبِّ اشْرَحْ لِي صَدْرِي وَيَسِّرْ لِي أَمْرِي وَاحْلُلْ عُقْدَةً مِنْ لِسَانِي يَفْقَهُوا قَوْلِي

Please share and leave your feedback below, Jazak'Allah!